Contact agreement: a complete guide to child contact agreements in Denmark

When parents separate, the most important question is usually: where should the children live, and when do they see the other parent? A contact agreement is the legal answer. It sets out when and how the child is with the parent they do not live with, and it can prevent conflicts that could otherwise drag on for years.

This guide reviews everything you need to know about contact agreements in Denmark: what they should contain, which contact arrangements are most common, and how to make an agreement, either directly with the other parent or via the Agency of Family Law (Familieretshuset).

What is a contact agreement?

A contact agreement is a written agreement between two parents about when and how a child spends time with the parent the child does not have their permanent residence with. The agreement sets out the contact, that is the contact a parent has with their child even though they do not live together permanently.

The legal basis is the Parental Responsibility Act (forældreansvarsloven). The Act is based on the principle that a child has the right to contact with both parents, and that the parents have a mutual duty to help make the contact work in practice, when it is in the child's best interests.

A contact agreement is not the same as a custody agreement. Custody concerns the right to make the important decisions about the child, for example about the choice of school and health. The contact agreement governs the practical time and contact. The two agreements supplement each other but are separate documents.

When do you need a contact agreement?

The need for a contact agreement arises when parents do not live together and have children in common. This applies in three broad situations:

Divorce

Spouses with children who divorce must decide on residence and contact. The agreement can be made as part of the divorce case or afterwards. If you have joint custody and agree on the contact, you do not need to involve the authorities, and a private written agreement is sufficient.

Separation

Separation differs from divorce in that you are still legally married for a period. But the need for a contact agreement is the same from the moment you stop living together.

Unmarried parents

Many children in Denmark have parents who have never been married. When such a couple separates, the same questions about residence and contact arise. A contact agreement is at least as relevant here, and often even more important to formalise in writing, because there is no official divorce procedure that automatically forces the parties to decide.

What should a contact agreement contain?

A good contact agreement covers all the practical matters that typically give rise to disagreement. The more precise the agreement, the fewer conflicts arise.

The basic contact arrangement

The most important element is the contact arrangement itself: when is the child with which parent? Describe it specifically:

• Which days the child is with the contact parent
• Whether the contact starts Friday afternoon or Monday morning
• When the child is dropped off and picked up

Holidays and public holidays

The allocation of the summer holidays, Christmas, Easter and the autumn holiday should be agreed expressly. Without an agreement on the holidays, it is common for parents to disagree every year about who has the child at Christmas. Typical models:

• Alternating: The child spends Christmas with one parent one year and with the other the next
• Split: The child is with one on Christmas Eve and with the other on Christmas Day
• Fixed allocation: The child is always with one parent on Christmas Eve and a fixed part of the summer holiday with the other

Transport and pick-up

Set out who drives and who pays for the transport. A common approach in Denmark is that the contact parent (the parent the child does not live with) picks up and brings the child, but it is agreed individually. The distance between the parents' homes can make transport a decisive point.

Communication during contact

Many agreements specify that the child has the right to call the other parent during contact, and that no parent prevents it. It is a simple provision that can prevent many conflicts.

Illness and cancellations

What happens if the child is ill at a contact time? What if the contact parent is suddenly prevented? A good agreement addresses this, for example that lost contact is made up within the following week.

Typical contact arrangements

There is no single contact arrangement that fits all families. The choice depends on the children's age, the parents' residence, working hours and the relationship between the parties.

7/7: week on, week off (shared arrangement)

The most equal arrangement: the child is one week with one parent and the next week with the other. The change typically happens Sunday evening, Monday morning or Friday afternoon.

Suitable for: Parents who live close to each other, children who are comfortable with changes, and situations with genuinely shared daily care. A shared arrangement gives the child close contact with both parents but requires good communication and logistics.

9/5: nine days, five days

A slightly asymmetric arrangement that typically gives the child their primary residence with one parent but still frequent contact. The child is, for example, nine days with the residence parent and five days with the contact parent in a two-week cycle.

Suitable for: Families who want a degree of continuity with one parent but still want active contact.

10/4: ten days, four days

Here the child lives mostly with the residence parent, with contact on weekends and possibly a single weekday afternoon. It roughly corresponds to what has historically been the standard contact in Denmark.

Suitable for: Younger children, a large distance between the parents' homes, or situations with a marked difference in the parents' ability to care for the child.

Individually adapted contact

Contact can be structured entirely individually and depart from the typical arrangements, for example based on the parents' shift work, seasonal work or particular family circumstances. What matters is that the agreement is clear and practically workable.

Agreed no contact

In rare cases, contact can be left out entirely, for example if it is assessed to be harmful to the child. This is a very serious decision that typically requires the Agency of Family Law's assessment and should never be agreed without professional advice.

How do you make a contact agreement?

There are two routes: a voluntary agreement directly between the parents, or an agreement facilitated by the Agency of Family Law.

Voluntary agreement (recommended)

If you can agree the contact amicably, it is by far the best solution, both for you and for the child. A voluntary agreement:

• Is based on your family's specific situation
• Avoids waiting times and formal procedures
• Gives flexibility and ownership of the agreement
• Is faster and cheaper

A voluntary agreement should always be made in writing. An oral agreement is difficult to document and enforce. With a template, you can fill in the relevant points and sign the agreement, and both parents keep a copy.

Agreement via the Agency of Family Law

If you cannot agree, one parent can ask the Agency of Family Law for help. The Agency is the state authority that, among other things, handles cases about contact and custody.

The process at the Agency of Family Law:

1. You submit an application for contact
2. The Agency invites both parents to a meeting
3. The Agency tries to mediate and help you to an agreement
4. If you still cannot agree on anything, a decision can be made about the contact that is binding on both

Decisions on contact can be enforced, that is coercive measures can in the last resort be used to carry out the contact if a parent refuses to hand over the child.

Formalising a voluntary agreement

Even a voluntary agreement can be formalised at the Agency of Family Law, so it gets the same legal effect as an official decision and can thereby be enforced. It is a good idea, especially if the relationship is marked by disagreement.

Can a contact agreement be changed?

Yes. A contact agreement is not set in stone. Changed circumstances can provide grounds to adjust the agreement:

• The child grows older and has different needs and wishes
• A parent moves to a new town or another country
• A new partner and new family formations affect the everyday logistics
• The child's own wish, which from a certain age (typically 10-12 years) is given increasing weight

Voluntary change

If both parents agree on a change, a new written agreement is made that replaces the previous one. It is good practice to date and sign changes, so there is no doubt about which version applies.

Change via the Agency of Family Law

If only one parent wants a change, they can ask the Agency of Family Law to reopen the case. The Agency assesses whether there has been a material change in circumstances that can justify a new decision.

The child's perspective: Section 4 of the Parental Responsibility Act provides that decisions under the Act must be made on the basis of what is best for the child, and not on the basis of the parents' preferences alone. Under section 5, the child must also be involved, so their perspective can be expressed. This applies to the authorities' decisions but should of course also guide the parents' own agreements.

Contact agreement and custody: what is the difference?

It is important not to confuse the contact agreement and the custody agreement:

	Contact agreement	Custody agreement
Governs	Time and contact	Decision-making authority
Example	When the child is with whom	Who decides on the choice of school
Requirement	Writing recommended	An agreement to transfer custody must be reported to the Agency of Family Law to be valid
Change	Voluntary or via the Agency of Family Law	Voluntary or via the Agency of Family Law

If you have joint custody, you make the important decisions about the child jointly, but that says nothing about where the child lives and when it sees whom. That is what the contact agreement governs.

What does a contact agreement cost?

Solution	Price (approx.)
Do-it-yourself with a template	Low one-off price
The Agency of Family Law (mediation and decision)	Free
A lawyer to draft it	DKK 2,000-6,000
A lawyer for the Agency of Family Law procedure	DKK 5,000-20,000

A private, written contact agreement made with a template is the cheapest solution and fully sufficient if you can agree the contact amicably. The Agency of Family Law's handling is free but often time-consuming.

Frequently asked questions about contact agreements

Does a contact agreement have to be approved by the authorities to be valid?

No. A voluntary, written agreement between parents is legally valid without approval by the authorities. It is, however, not automatically enforceable. If you want the agreement to be enforceable, it must be formalised at the Agency of Family Law or before the family court.

What happens if one parent does not comply with the contact agreement?

If one parent does not comply with an official contact agreement (that is an agreement formalised via the Agency of Family Law or the family court), the other parent can ask for it to be enforced. In repeated cases, coercive fines can be imposed, and in the last resort coercive measures can be used to collect the child.

For a private agreement without official formalisation, the options are limited, and formalisation is therefore recommended if there is a risk of conflict.

Can the child decide whether it wants contact?

From around the age of 10-12, the child's own wishes are given increasing weight in decisions about contact, but it is not the child that decides finally. Section 4 of the Parental Responsibility Act provides that the child's best interests are decisive, and the child's view is one element among several, under section 5.

What applies if a parent moves?

A residence parent must give the other parent notice if they want to move, at the latest 6 weeks before the move. A move abroad with the child requires either the other parent's consent (with joint custody) or a decision from the authorities. Disagreement about whether the child may move can be brought before the Agency of Family Law and the family court. The contact arrangement will often have to be adjusted after a move.

Can you make a temporary contact agreement?

Yes. A temporary agreement can give both parents time to try out an arrangement before you formalise a permanent solution. It can be relevant in the period just after a separation, when everyday life has not yet settled.

Is there a difference between contact and a shared arrangement?

Yes. Traditional "contact" describes an arrangement where the child lives mainly with one parent and has contact with the other (typically on weekends and holidays). A "shared arrangement" is a more equal allocation, typically 7/7 or similar, where neither parent is unambiguously the "contact parent".

Conclusion

A contact agreement is one of the most important agreements you make as a parent who does not live with the other parent. It creates predictability for the child, prevents conflicts and documents what you agree on.

The most important advice: make the agreement in writing, be precise about the details, and remember to include holidays and public holidays. If you agree, a good template is often all it takes. If there is disagreement, the Agency of Family Law is there to help. And remember that a contact agreement is never final but can be adjusted as the family and children develop.

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The content of this article is for guidance only and does not constitute legal advice. Consult a family-law lawyer or contact the Agency of Family Law if you are unsure of your rights in your specific situation.